Archive for Anger
Just a few weeks ago, as my husband and I were having a nice quiet dinner at home, I had just taken a bite of food and a sharp pain went shooting up into my mouth and jaw. I dropped my fork and knife, ran upstairs, rinsed my mouth out, flossed and brushed my teeth and looked in the mirror. O.M.G.! One of my teeth was split in half!
The next morning I called my dentist and he took me in on an emergency basis, removing the broken half of the tooth. He was hoping the tooth would be salvageable, but it wasn’t. He referred me to an oral surgeon and I made an appointment. For a few days I could only eat soft foods and only chew on one side. Soon after, I starting getting a shooting pain on the other side of my jaw! I called my dentist who took me on an emergency basis again and said it was my last remaining wisdom tooth– the good news was that the oral surgeon could extract both of them at the same time!
The bright side of this whole experience is that my husband and I got to spend a whole day together and, although he has always been warm and caring, he was so nurturing making sure that I had everything I needed to follow the doctor’s protocol. This experience actually forced me to relax and do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, which for me is almost an impossible feat! I have always been energetic, so this was a challenge! I also choose to see the underlying blessing of having both teeth removed at the same time instead of having this experience twice!
So in conclusion the old saying, “look for the silver lining,” in situations that feel like a curve ball has been thrown your way, rings true!
It appears that many people use chemical substances such as cigarettes, marijuana, recreational drugs, alcohol and over-the-counter drugs to numb their emotional pains and discomforts but then, many times, it becomes an addiction. Alcohol seems to be the most “socially acceptable” chemical addiction that is served in many restaurants and has become a popular phenomenon in the wine-tasting industry. When I was a little girl, growing up in Los Angeles, my grandpa- an immigrant from Sicily- made homemade wine in barrels in the basement. It was only natural that the adults in the family always had a glass or two of wine with their meals. In most cultures, this is acceptable and normal, but it could also be a precursor to an addiction if abused.
Through hypnotherapy, I have been able to help and guide people of all ages to free themselves from addictive behaviors. With any chemical addiction, such as cigarettes, marijuana, cocaine, heroin and alcohol, it actually takes only 72 hours for the addiction to leave the body. After 72 hours, the rest is behavior modification. Through hypnotherapy and life and mindfulness coaching, I teach my clients how to help themselves and how to create healthier, more beneficial habits so they can live a life of freedom.
When you hear “happy holidays!”, what thoughts and feelings come up for you? For many people, the holidays are exciting, exhilarating, fun and festive! For others, the holidays bring up some negative thoughts and feelings, such as sadness (memories of holidays past), stress (due to all of the holiday hustle and bustle), or loneliness (for those who have gone through a separation/divorce or loss of a loved one). Some people get annoyed at all of the festivities, but it may be that those people have suffered loss or associate other negative feelings with the holidays.
Are you in the holiday spirit this year, or are you wishing it would just pass quickly? Maybe your loved ones live far away and you are unable to be with them. Do you get stressed out trying to please everyone else and not yourself? Do you end up going to multiple parties, splitting up time between your side of the family and your partner’s side of the family with people who EXPECT you to be with them? This hustle, bustle and expectation during the holidays can leave you frazzled.
If you can relate to any of these situations, make sure you take at least a few hours for yourself. Whether it’s going for a massage, having lunch with a close friend, or sitting in a quiet place reading a book, TAKE TIME FOR YOU!
For some, the holidays bring up being more charitable and generous with time, energy and money. Have you ever volunteered at a charitable organization, a church, a synagogue, homeless shelter, or a food-share drive? If so, how did that make you feel? Usually, people that contribute their time, effort and money to others get more out of it than the receiver. If you are feeling a little ‘under the weather’ this year, I encourage you to reach out to others. You may be surprised how just an hour or two of your time, kindness and love can affect someone in a positive way. Give out big hugs generously! Hugs are free, but they can make someone feel loved and like a million dollars! As you think about this holiday season, which is in full swing, ask yourself “what can I do for others, while also caring for myself?”
Fear is a primal instinct dating all the way back to primordial times. In our primitive mind, we have the instincts of fight and flight which keep us out of danger. Today, in my Toastmasters’ meeting, several of us were asked to do a spontaneous Halloween-themed speech and I was chosen to speak on “the fear of Halloween.” I personally do not “fear” Halloween itself; but if and when I go into a haunted house, see a scary movie, or someone comes to the door in a scary mask, I will definitely be startled. I startle quite easily and my friends and family always have fun teasing me on Halloween!
So, what is fear? Many people believe that FEAR is “False Evidence Appearing Real,” which can be true for some. For instance, whether it’s a person in a costume or simply a scary manikin, often we react automatically as if it’s real. It is our perception that creates the emotions that come up. Many times when these emotions rise they can cause shortness of breath, elevation of blood pressure, crying and, in worst-case-scenarios, may even cause a heart attack! Not to mention, some horror movies are so emotionally charged that we may even clench our neighbor’s hand, scream and/or jump out of our seat in the theater! Of course, isn’t it the film industry’s job to elicit emotions with everything they produce? I guess that’s entertainment!
These are examples of the power of suggestion and perception. A suggestive stimulus (like a scary manikin or someone in a costume) can cause us to perceive a threat and bring about the fear response.
Just imagine if every morning when you wake up, your perception of your surroundings and your life is positive and happy. This power of perception will bring up positive emotions and set the tone for the day. As I always say, “A positive life begins with a positive mind.”
Some people are aware of this technique that many refer to as “tapping.” This technique is based upon Ancient Chinese acupressure which is a method for people of all ages and stages of life to use to “tap out” negative emotions. This technique is quite unique in that you use your finger tips to tap on certain areas of your upper body to “tap out” negative thoughts, feelings and emotions.
I had the privilege of learning EFT from one of the students of the originators.
I will never forget just a few weeks after I had taken the intensive EFT course, when a client was experiencing an extreme anxiety attack due to devastating negative situations that had occurred that were out of his control. I immediately had him practice deep breathing, gave him a glass of water and, while facing him, walked him through the Emotional Freedom Technique. Within about 10 minutes, he had “tapped out” the negative emotions, was able to breathe more freely and deeply and had calmed down significantly. I then asked him who is medical doctor was, dialed the phone number for him and had him make an appointment to be seen to rule out any chemical and/or psychological imbalances.
Since then, I have helped hundreds of clients free themselves from the negative emotions that have held them back from being the best they can be.
I will teach you how to practice EFT on your own along with written instructions!
If you are interested in experiencing this wonderful technique, please feel free to contact me at 818-262-1246.